My reading and writing habit

“Have I read all these books, haven’t I?” I asked myself and before answering the question in positive I asked myself again why I do that. Although it was a very painful and embarrassing question yet I needed to reply.

It all started with my childhood when my father started tilling my interest in poems, stories and books. He helped me to understand the difficult passages with some simple examples of life. I found it all very interesting and encouraging.

Actually those were the times when the seeds of reading were sown and I started reading books voluntarily and independently. I loved sorting out words, idioms and phrases that could help me express my world of adventure, mystery, tragedy and joy. I wanted to read anything and everything my hands could lay on, from Archie's books to photo romance.

I have so for almost two decades in learning and enriching myself and then I came up with my first novel. I tried many publishers whose books I came across, but none opened their doors for me. I tried to get it published of my own then I needed to hunt out the “people who read.”

Sadly It was a new business to me. I was consigned for a new job which could never be of my taste but I tried hard and I gifted many to many people but gradually I landed with thousands of critics but alas! to admit that there were none to be a reader.

Now I found all the doors are closed. My action suddenly stopped. I asked myself- publishers don’t to publish and readers don’t want to read, for whom I am supposed to burn my midnight oil.

Invariably, I soon realized I did all this for my own pleasure. I read and re-read a book and kept it on the bookshelf to read it again on the future date; to look for something interesting in it and to enjoy in giving these books to its new readers.

But I think there are many such enjoyable books missing from my bookshelves and I have no idea of them ever returning. I believe that a book has its own journey to make and I need not feel sorry for the missing ones. They might be on their long interminable journey. And the journey of my reading and writing keep on going undisturbed.